Week 8/6: Where has complaining ever got you?

HARD AT IT: Catriona is all business here

THE Amazing 12 Chichester is now at the halfway stage for Jemma and Jade, whereas Catriona and Reg have come to the end of their eight-week version.

This weekend, when they have their photos taken, I’ll see, visually at least, how much progress Catriona and Reg have made. It’s already quite apparent, though.

A few moments stuck out for me this week during training at Core Results Gym. One was when Catriona deadlifted 65kg for multiple reps and sets with good form and stayed strong throughout. She weighs only 51kg (having lost 4kgs since beginning the program – that’s the lightest she can remember being).

But considering she had zero lifting experience when she started and a few weeks back had struggled with a weight that was significantly lighter, it was quite a proud moment to see that sort of progress.

STEP AHEAD: Reg is moving faster and better

The second was during a warm-up when I had Reg push the prowler. Instead, though, he started jogging with it. So to have seen Reg go from a hobble to struggling to crawl to walking quickly to a light run was quite a staggering transition given that at a starting weight of 25st-plus, he had issues with his knees and heel that caused him to miss a few sessions.

Those were the highs. But there were some lows. This week more than any other I noticed the level of complaining reach a new level.

Complaining is nothing new to a gym environment or my waves of the Amazing 12 Chichester for that matter. This program isn’t exactly a walk in the park – and it can’t be to get the results that are achieved. I’m used to listening to grumbling.

It’s also quite a British thing to moan, especially about the weather and traffic and whatever else. 

But it made me think about how self-defeating complaining really is.

I understand some people complain to let off steam or to deal with fear or to get attention or without even realising how much they do it. But I can only reach one conclusion.

Complaining is simply a waste of energy.

Here is my question: how does complaining enable or help you to become the best version of yourself?

UP THEY GO: But Jemma frequently faces her doubts

I hope that if you try to answer it sincerely, it stops you in your tracks and makes you take stock of how pointless complaining is. At the very least it should make you assess for a moment how much you might be complaining about things and how much you are selling yourself short by doing so. 

When I look at successful people or high-achievers or people we generally aspire to be like, I don’t see complainers. I see doers. I see people who take action. I see people who are effective and, more importantly, decisive at making changes.

I see people who get on with things. I see individuals who refuse to join in the drama and are focused on what they want to achieve. I see people who use their energy to inspire, motivate and encourage rather than blame or complain. I see people who find solutions rather than moan about the problems.

Most importantly, I see people who have the antidote to complaining: gratitude.

FEELING IT: Jade’s getting stronger

That’s to say that if you complain, you generally see things negatively and if you are grateful, you see things positively.

This isn’t something you are born with. This is learned and practiced behaviour, which means it can be reversed or changed – if you want it to be.

However, I still catch myself complaining. We all complain. But the degree to which we complain and the time we spend complaining is significant and varies.

The key to my statement is that I ‘catch myself’ complaining, meaning I realise it’s something I do from time to time almost unconsciously or habitually. But I’d rather not and I try not to.

TRIUMPH: That moment in the deadlift for Catriona

Some of us, though, are chronic complainers. You don’t have to be Stephen Hawking to figure out that if you complain a lot you can’t be very satisfied.

If you’re not satisfied, it’s not the complaining that will change your circumstances. It’s taking action that makes the difference.

A friend of mine and former British boxing champion from the 1980s, Gary De’Roux, once said to me when I was complaining to him about something during conversation many years ago, “don’t complain. Do something about it.”

His words packed a punch. Gary’s a no-nonsense sort of guy. Sounding off doesn’t do anything but produce hot air. Your situation remains the same and you run the risk of creating negative energy around you.

DOUBLE TROUBLE: Jemma taking on the weight and how it makes her hands feel

On a neurological level, though, there’s good reason to take complaining seriously. There’s a direct link between complaining and negativity. And there’s a strong connection between negativity and depression as there is between negativity and worry and, consequently, stress.

Stress affects all aspects of our health and well-being. In its most negative form, it is draining and weakening and life-threatening. Stress also raises our cortisol levels, which makes it harder for us to sleep soundly. This, amongst other things, limits our ability to grow and recover. It can also lead to weight and fat gain.

Yet research shows that most people complain at least once every minute during a typical conversation.

REFLECTION: Do we see things as they are or as we want them to be?

Complaining, though, can feel good to some of us, because sometimes you feel as if you are sharing an experience that’s bothering you and getting a worry off your chest. But every time you complain, you wire your brain to do more complaining.

Studies out of Stanford University in America have shown that complaining shrinks the part of the brain responsible for intelligence and problem-solving. This is the same part of the brain that deteriorates in patients who have Alzheimer’s.

In my world of training people to get stronger and fitter and move better, I hear complaints all the time that range from “do we have to?” to “I can’t do that” to “this hurts” to “that’s too hard” to “I’m bored with this food”  to “can’t we do this instead?” etc. The list is endless.

DR. DREAD: Reg finds crawling more daunting than anything else

Complaining is a disease as well as a form of resistance – not accepting things as they are. Resistance is going against the flow of life and thus makes what you may be complaining about even worse.

Let’s not confuse complaining with speaking out. One is negative and the other positive. As author Eckhart Tolle wrote, “When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power.”

Getting and achieving results more often than not doesn’t involve a process that is enjoyable or easy. You have to make a sacrifice. But you can either fight it or accept and get on with it or find a solution. I know which options make the most sense.

GETTING ON WITH IT: Catriona in work mode

Essentially, complaining is wasting valuable time. As Randy Pausch wrote in The Last Lecture, “if you took one tenth of the energy you put into complaining and applied it to solving the problem, you’d be surprised how well things can work out.”

However, if you are locked into a pattern of complaining, you’re going to have to work hard to change it.

Training the body is a process of change through repetition and adaptation. So when we complain there’s a process of practice and repetition taking place in our brains. We’re hard-wiring ourselves to get better…at complaining!

Complaining, from my experience, weakens my attitude, makes my thinking more fragile and leaves me more likely to fail in a given task. It takes away any pleasure, too.  

MIND GAMES: Once Jemma tames her thinking she will go to another level

As they say, “Complaining is a zero return investment.”

If you are aware you complain a lot and don’t mindfully try to fix it, you’ll simply get better at it and the issues or problems taxing you will remain or escalate. However, if you are aware you complain and want to change, you can try to tackle it the same way you would if your aim was to change your fitness levels or lose weight or gain weight or get stronger.

You show up every day with the intention and commitment to do better than the day before. And like learning any new skill, initially, you have to think hard about and work hard at it – until it becomes your default response.

Complaining is verbalising a negative thought. Your thoughts determine your actions. It’s impossible to think negatively, act negatively and yet produce positivity.

Here’s the challenge.

  1. Each time you complain, catch yourself and try to either think of a positive alternative or solution instead.
  2. Don’t beat yourself up if you struggle or else you’ll just be complaining again. It’s a process and will take time.
  3. Try going 24 hours without complaining and see what happens.
HURT: This week left Reg’s legs feeling a bit sore

The Amazing 12 Chichester isn’t just about the physical. Often our bodies are an expression of what and how we are thinking. So to make a complete transformation and get the optimum results, we sometimes have to start with the mind and our attitude. 

We can only be as strong as our weakest link and often that is in the way we are thinking.

Progress requires patience, time, effort and consistency. Complaining just means you don’t enjoy the experience.  

Think you have what it takes to do the Amazing 12 Chichester like Catriona, Reg, Jade and Jemma? Catriona is continuing for another two weeks before she goes on holiday and Reg is going to do the same before he takes a summer break and then embarks on another round of the program in September.

I’m taking applications for the September wave that begins on the 18th and ends in mid-December. Contact me at Claude@intelligentstrength.co.uk for more details or if you have any questions.

 

Week 3: The key to success

I’M in the business of producing results. That’s what separates something that works from something that does not. In the fitness industry, people want results and more often than not in an unreasonably short time.

The Amazing 12 goes beyond fitness because it develops strength, conditioning, mindset, technique, discipline, confidence and a host of other attributes. However, the main reason the Amazing 12 has a stellar reputation is from the results that have consistently been achieved by its trainers on individuals of all shapes and sizes and athletic backgrounds from around the world.

Aside from the Amazing 12 program itself, what, though, is the key ingredient for success?

I’ll tell you: consistency. And to have consistency, you have to show up. Every day – or however many times the program you are on demands that you attend. In the case of the Amazing 12 it is five times each week on consecutive days.

One of the main reasons I have observed for why fitness goals are not achieved is that people don’t see through to the end whatever program they start and/or that they don’t follow a program precisely as it was written.

Inevitably, there will be days when you simply don’t feel like training. There will be days when it’s cold or raining outside and you have to get up early to run. There will be days when you feel below par. There will be days when you feel run down and stressed. There will be days when you feel emotionally drained. There will be days when you lack confidence, self-worth and strength…

But training – and following a program like the Amazing 12 – is an opportunity to develop the resolute mindset that, come what may, you’ll be there. Don’t let the little voice in your head that’s good at talking you out of things prevail. Showing up is an ability that not only can be learned and cultivated and yields results from training, but it also spills over into all other fields of life.

Being consistent effectively means you never stop trying and it’s through trying – practice – that we improve and make progress. If you keep showing up, no matter what, I know you have a far greater chance of succeeding than if you don’t. That’s a stone-cold fact.

Stacey on one of her more energised days

Every time you summon the strength or drive or courage to overcome the obstacle in your way, you make yourself stronger, more determined and self-driven.

However, there are some instances when it’s better to take a day off training and this can be difficult for many people. You may be exhausted or injured or sleep-deprived. In those circumstances you have to learn to listen to your body – become good at identifying when it’s better to ease off or push on.

Reasons for not showing up are not the same as excuses. Reasons are legitimate. Excuses, though, get in the way of succeeding.

I ask a lot from my clients on the Amazing 12. After all, they want results and I am as invested as they are in achieving them. If they don’t succeed, then neither do I. We are, effectively, a team.

Stacey gets a bit of massage therapy to ease her neck pain

This week, Stacey sent me a message one morning complaining she’d slept awkwardly and hurt her neck. I told her to come in anyway and that I’d get my wife, Jamie, who practices Thai Yoga Massage amongst other things, to work on the tender area. Stacey got through the session without difficulty.

“Normally, I’d have just not come in with something like that,” Stacey told me. “But, actually, it was fine.”

Good squat form

By the end of the week, though, following two nights where she didn’t sleep at all after a week of looking after her six-month-old son by herself, Stacey was completely shattered and understandably so. Reading the situation, she had a day off to recover.

Ben and Jo hard at it, but concentrating on technique

Ben’s had a lot going on in his personal life and admitted there have been some nights he’s felt worn down. But on those evenings he drags himself in for training regardless.

“I know I really enjoy it [the training],” he said. “I’m not the type of person who gives up. I intend to see this through. I can feel the changes. It’s given me a lot of focus when I’ve needed it.”

Getting your food organised…the most important workout of the week!

Jo’s been on-song this week. At the weekend she sent me a photo (above) of her food prep. I was most impressed. She spent a few hours cooking for the week ahead and then divided all her food into containers. Job done.

“It’s made such a difference and saved me so much time,” admitted Jo, who confesses she’s not the cooking type.

Her consistency is working. Her fitness and strength is improving. She is changing shape. Her recovery from strenuous activity is much better. And we are only a quarter of the way through the program.

No time to waste, Adriano flew in for the final session of the week

Adriano was away most of the week working in Africa. It’s not ideal for following the program, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. He fitted in a few training sessions while he was away. He returned to Heathrow airport Friday morning and, though a little tired, was in for training later that evening.

It would have been easy for Adriano to have taken the night off, but instead he was committed. And he did well.

As I said, if you don’t show up, you can’t make progress. It’s that simple.

Think you have in you the commitment to complete the Amazing 12 program and achieve extraordinary physical results? If you do or want to know more about the program and what it entails, send me a message to Claude@intelligentstrength.co.uk