Week 6/4: What exactly is success?

MOST of us think of success in terms of victory or completion or getting something right or doing well.

That’s totally understandable. That’s how most of us are raised or conditioned to think of success or what we are exposed to seeing. That’s how we tend to use the word.

There isn’t really a right or wrong answer to what it means. Each person has their own definition of success.

John Wooden, the great American basketball coach, coined his own understanding. “Peace of mind attained only through self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to be the best of which you are capable.”

Jemma and Jade, who this week completed week 4 of the Amazing 12 Chichester at Core Results Gym, both said that to them success meant “doing their best”. Jade added that, for her, being successful meant being happy.

And yet sometimes when Jade does her best, she doesn’t feel happy, because she feels she should have achieved more. Catriona, now at the end of week 6 of 8, often feels the same.

I would argue that for most of us success is defined more by the outcome than it is the process.

Each week teaching the Amazing 12, I deal with reactions and responses to effort that result in disappointment as well as joy and satisfaction.

Success is just a moment in time.

Professor Sarah Lewis said, “We thrive not when we’ve done it all, but when we still have more to do.”

In simpler terms, the journey is more important and rewarding than the ending.

In the context of the Amazing 12, the goal for some is to just reach the end of the program. For others it is to cherish each stage and moment or to hit certain targets that they have determined to be important, while some, like Reg, will consider the Amazing 12 as a part of a grander objective.

Successes, though, can be big or small. They can come every minute, hour, week, month or year.

And while we see failure as the opposite of success, can failure actually be a success? Isn’t success and failure only a relative term?

After all, we tend to learn more from our errors than when things run smoothly. I’m not suggesting we try to fail, but if mistakes and struggles have great value, shouldn’t we also celebrate setbacks as successes?

I have heard it said that “the choices we make under pressure define our character.” Character is something we should all endeavour to develop.

Character is what keeps us strong when everything around us is falling apart or chaotic or difficult. Character is what enables us to be resolute in the face of a storm of opposition. Reputation is what you are perceived to be, whereas character is who you really are. You can only reveal your true character by exposing yourself to arduous and testing circumstances.

In terms of the Amazing 12 and strength and fitness training, one’s character will come under examination in order to improve and usually when we are being challenged.

To those who dislike or resist change, understand that there is no progress without change.

In week one, Jemma, for instance, would get uncomfortable whenever she felt her muscles burn or if a weight felt or looked too heavy. Those were character-testing moments.

But now, four weeks into the program, I can see the changes in her. I notice how she’s got more inner steel when the going gets tough. She grits her teeth instead of panicking. She embraces her strength instead of conceding she is weak.

I got an excited text from her near the end of the week. She’d been running in the morning. I told her to try to complete her course without stopping. When she tried it in the first week she had to stop eight times and found it tiring. But now she’s able to do it non-stop.

“I’m so thrilled,” she wrote.

In the four weeks since she started, Jemma has lost nearly a stone in weight. She’s noticed her body firming up, that she can run better and faster, that her recovery from exercise is improving. “It’s mad how much stronger I have become,” she said.

She hasn’t missed a day of training, though sometimes her mind is elsewhere. Concentration and focus are areas I try to work on with her in every session.

She gets anxious and stressed a lot, but the training always seems to help. “I’d much rather do this [Amazing 12] than just work out in a regular gym,” she said.

Making progress is a success for Jemma. “I would say putting in as much effort as you possibly can and knowing you’ve done your best to achieve results,” is how she defined it. “And if you have a goal, then reaching it is a success, too.”

But how we frame our goals and achievements will make all the difference. For example, Jemma felt as if she had struggled with one movement last week as she didn’t do as well as she had wanted. Then I revealed to her that, in fact, she’d completed more reps and lifted a heavier weight than a few days earlier on the same movement. In the space of one second she went from feeling like a failure to a success just by altering the perspective.

Jemma also expressed how she wanted to get as strong or as lean as some of the other girls who have done the Amazing 12. But then she felt disappointed at the prospect of it not being possible. She decided for herself what success and failure would mean. Most of us do. 

I answered her in the same way I do everyone else: You can only be the best and strongest version of yourself.

Jade, like Jemma, has been ever-present since week one. She’s now a third of the way through. She found defining success to be a tough question in spite of the fact she’s achieved quite a lot in athletic terms.

“Success is having a goal and completing it,” she said. “I want to be the best I can be.”

But what is being your best?

Jade admits she can be lazy. She told me before she started the program that she wants to “better herself” and “more of a push”.

Being ‘our best’ is relative to a given time frame. It could be for one game or a season or over a number of years or a lifetime. It needs to be quantified.

I would suggest that being the best you can be is striving for mastery, because mastery is rarely achieved.

By setting an objective that cannot be achieved it means you keep working and practicing and refining and there is no end game – unless you give up, in which case you definitely won’t succeed.

When there is an end game, it means that you stop. Then what? Who wants to stop when the value is all in the process?

Reg has understood from the beginning that the solution to losing weight and regaining his fitness isn’t a quick fix.

His aim is to get down to 18st from 25st. At his peak, Reg hit 26st. He stands 6ft 1in. “I may have to do this [Amazing 12] three times!” he said. “I’m looking at about a year [of training and eating well].”

Working out each evening has helped him. “It’s usually a time when I would get hungry and eat,” he said. Instead, Reg is training, building muscle, moving his body and developing his fitness.

Sometimes it is more about introducing more good habits into your lifestyle than it is removing the bad ones.

Reg had to miss one session this week. He hurt his knee playing golf. But the next day, he and Jemma put in a good shift.

“Once you’ve done a session it feels good,” said Reg as we finished with some sledgehammering on to a tyre.

While Reg’s knee is his problem, Catriona is hindered by an old shoulder injury, leaving one side clearly weaker than the other.

It doesn’t cause her pain, but it is the weakest link in her chain and the Amazing 12 has exposed it to the point that she maybe now realises the importance of addressing it.

In reality, Catriona can only be as strong as that shoulder allows. As the body is all connected, you can’t take the shoulder out of the equation.

Her list of definitions for success included “believing that you can” and “overcoming fear” and “learning something new each day” and “not giving up” and “celebrating small victories” and “understanding you control your own destiny”.   

Those are all positive and valuable. But I want to put it out there that success can be in everything and I mean everything.

I’ve alluded to how we learn the most from when things don’t go according to plan or when we are enduring hardship.

When we switch our attention to how we can benefit from ALL experiences, success is around us continually. You just need to recognise it. 

Winston Churchill captured it best for me. “Success,” he said, “is the ability to move from one failure to another with enthusiasm.”

The next wave of the Amazing 12 will begin in September. This isn’t a program just to improve strength, conditioning, body composition and technique. There is so much more. It will challenge the way you think, prepare, plan and live. If you want to be considered for the program or to find out more, please send me an email at Claude@intelligentstrength.co.uk